Disco Duck Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 I've always tried to be the one to be there for people. Its knocked me for six not feeling in control of myself anymore. Reading through this thread really opened my eyes to how other people are going through similar things. I kind of felt for the last ten years all i've been doing is getting on with it with a fake smile where in truth i'm broken inside. I've realised this is an illness which took me a while as I thought I was weak. I've got an appointment tomorrow with the doctor as I need to sort this out. It can be all too easy to look at other people and assume everybody else has it sorted - everyone is confident, never puts a foot wrong, is on an even keel. Truth is there is no way to tell how anybody else is. Hope the appointment with the doc goes well. Don't be afraid to accept help, whether it's tablets, counselling, a more frequent GP visit or even posting on here. They won't necessarily all help, but at least one of them will. I remember being told by a psychologist (outwith his practice) that depression invariably improves if afforded enough time. It can just be very difficult to realise it when you're in the midst of it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NotThePars Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 Split up with my girlfriend last week and finding it a bit tough. Not so much about missing her or anything just it's coincided with a lot of uni work, winter and being skint so I'm stuck in a lot with no company and nothing to do. This thread's a great read though and inspiring to see a lot of people prepared to talk things over and help each other. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ForeverSinging Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 I remember being told by a psychologist (outwith his practice) that depression invariably improves if afforded enough time. It can just be very difficult to realise it when you're in the midst of it. That's a great thought to bear in mind, thanks for that 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Homer Thompson Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 The company knows I'm in employment now. My first payment to them was on my first pay day. They said I can up the sum I pay every month, and it's something I think I'll do at some point. I was warned by the money advice person I saw that it can be difficult to decrease the amount you pay after you'd upped it (as the companies you're paying would have to agree to it and one or two saying no would scupper that), so want to hold off for a while until I'm more secure. Fair enough. Sounds like they're getting you a good deal 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 Fair enough. Sounds like they're getting you a good deal Aye it was really easy in the end and such a weigh off my mind. My credit score was utterly fucked anyway so 7 years of being on some pishy list doesn't bother me. I can never see affording a house of my own anyway, so won't be needing a mortgage any time soon, and I have no reason to get credit in any other capacity. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YHallSaint Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 Firstly I would like to thank everyone for their words of support and advice. I was slightly worried about posting but after reading the thread and seeing everyone else's stories I think it was a good thing I did. Last night I actually managed to sleep and felt a weight off my shoulders so to everyone who replied to my post I Thank You... After my appointment today it seems the best solution to my problems is counselling. I have been before but only ever for short period of times of 3-5 sessions and I have agreed to keep going now for a sustained period of a minimum of a couple months. I think realising and admitting I have an illness has helped, it has been hard to take but i'm as ready as I ever will be to confront it and move on. First things first I am going to look for a job outside of my own work. Working for myself and not always having regular work has been an issue for me recently so I am going to look for something even if its just temporary to get regular work. Another thing I have chose to do is to stop drinking. I'm not a heavy drinker by any means however I class myself as a binge drinker. I struggle to stop once I start and recently I have noticed myself have a couple vodka's and wake up and the whole bottle is gone. It is a choice I am making as I don't want anything to stop my progress. I need to look forward and fight my way through this. I feel positive about this and it's the correct way of moving forward again with my life. I dwelled on the past but what happened, happened. I can't change it and I can't do anything about it. I need to think about the future and to make it as good as possible. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa Cuddy Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 Well done, YHall. A really big well done. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DAFC Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 Well done, I think looking to the future is the key. You can't change the past, even though it has changed you. Time to fight back. Stopping drinking is a good thing if you're only doing it on your own. I think I've realised that dwelling on the past has made me negative and bitter at times and that because of the injustice if felt I have to right wrongs or keep proving myself. I've been saying to myself that I have to take a lot of credit for coming through this and seeing it in perspective. Sounds daft maybe but in some ways I've done well to handle all the shit while still being able to hold down a job and look after myself on my own. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YHallSaint Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 Onwards and upwards. I need to stop being so hard on myself and look forward now 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotfree Posted November 22, 2013 Share Posted November 22, 2013 I took an overdose of paracetamol 2 weeks ago. Was in the hospital for a few days. I had been doing so well for a while too. I have to say that I was treated brilliantly in the hospital. Oh well. Onward and upward. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotfree Posted November 22, 2013 Share Posted November 22, 2013 Too fucking hot! And cheers min. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MONKMAN Posted November 22, 2013 Share Posted November 22, 2013 Just checked the bank after Amsterdam at the weekend, then Norway Monday to Wednesday. I'm officially suffering from depression. -2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paranoid android Posted November 22, 2013 Author Share Posted November 22, 2013 I took an overdose of paracetamol 2 weeks ago. Was in the hospital for a few days. I had been doing so well for a while too. I have to say that I was treated brilliantly in the hospital. Oh well. Onward and upward. Stick in, mate. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyle Lanley Posted November 26, 2013 Share Posted November 26, 2013 :( 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcdefg Posted November 26, 2013 Share Posted November 26, 2013 Thought I'd post my story, and hopefully it will help a few folk out there who feel like they're suffering alone. From 1st-4th year at High School I was extremely lonely, socially inept and felt utterly out of sync with other young people. The people I called friends were all similarly socially inept and psychologically bullied me to make themselves feel better, but I stayed with them throughout high school because the alternative was to make new friends, which I couldn't imagine happening. I'm pretty sure I suffered from sort of depression at school and used to spend two-three weeks in the house at a time. Fast forward 7 years and I am a completely different person to who I was then. I still have issues with trusting people, but I have developed a solid group of friends who are actual friends, have a girlfriend and a full time job. I am a much happier person than I was at high school and I am a genuinely confident and outgoing person. My main point is, to anyone reading who is having a hard time at High School and suffering low spells, it doesn't last forever and there are hundreds of young people going through the exact same issues. There is a lot of help available through Breathing Space and your GP. Just always remember that High School doesn't go on forever and you can always create a new you. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lyle Lanley Posted November 26, 2013 Share Posted November 26, 2013 Thought I'd post my story, and hopefully it will help a few folk out there who feel like they're suffering alone. From 1st-4th year at High School I was extremely lonely, socially inept and felt utterly out of sync with other young people. The people I called friends were all similarly socially inept and psychologically bullied me to make themselves feel better, but I stayed with them throughout high school because the alternative was to make new friends, which I couldn't imagine happening. I'm pretty sure I suffered from sort of depression at school and used to spend two-three weeks in the house at a time. Fast forward 7 years and I am a completely different person to who I was then. I still have issues with trusting people, but I have developed a solid group of friends who are actual friends, have a girlfriend and a full time job. I am a much happier person than I was at high school and I am a genuinely confident and outgoing person. My main point is, to anyone reading who is having a hard time at High School and suffering low spells, it doesn't last forever and there are hundreds of young people going through the exact same issues. There is a lot of help available through Breathing Space and your GP. Just always remember that High School doesn't go on forever and you can always create a new you. Welcome to the forum mate. I had a hard time at high school too. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Theo Snelders Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 YHallSaint, glad you managed to get the help you need, and Scotfree hope you are getting support/feeling better. In common with others, I had an awful time at school and that's when my first episode of depression happened. Used my bad experiences for some good hopefully- now a mental health nurse treating folk who have it far worse than I ever will. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotfree Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 I get brilliant support over here Theo. Feeling better thanks. I had a hard time at High school as well. I was brought up as a Jehovah Witness (not one anymore) which made it rather hard for me back then. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YHallSaint Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 A wee update. Been for a couple appointments since the last time I was on here. They're hard at times but have been feeling better since going. Have also stopped looking for work and set up a small xmas business selling retro sweet boxes. It keeps me busy and focused on something and not as much stress especially weather permitting at this time of year. I might not have got much work especially if the snow comes again. Early signs are i'll do alright and get enough to get through xmas. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotfree Posted November 27, 2013 Share Posted November 27, 2013 Sounds like things are moving in the right way for you YHS. Good to hear. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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