supermik Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 Once had them knock the door at 3.15pm on Christmas Day. We had just started dinner. Woman had a young child with her. Told her that I did not give a monkeys chuff and to piss off. She replied to me that I should think of the children. I told her to think of her own child and give them a life away from her batshit mental beliefs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 Couple posts above remind me of an old, shite, joke but I’m a bit fucked so here it is...Wife with a collection tin “support child’s cancer sir?”I “no, on balance, I’m against child’s cancer and I’m surprised you’re not”Not even sorry. Goodnight x 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
capybara Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 Every weekend through the warmer months, charity beggars are to be found at the door of our local supermarket, often with a table set up. You have to run the gauntlet every damn time. Most of them are happy enough with a simple response of “No thanks”but occasionally one will up the stakes. “Really? You don’t care that children are dying of cancer?”Burn them all. There was a guy in my local B AND M ( yes I know) trying to catch folk for a standing order for charity. I wait until some other sucker is grasped and then saunter in. I have a direct debit set up to a mental health charity so I am not a complete heartless b*****d. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 There was a guy in my local B AND M ( yes I know) trying to catch folk for a standing order for charity. I wait until some other sucker is grasped and then saunter in. I have a direct debit set up to a mental health charity so I am not a complete heartless b*****d.That patter gets on my tits too. No I am not standing in a shop filling in my bank details for a complete random. Perhaps for someone rattling a tin they will get something. Poke yer direct debit though. Still maintain the studenty type, and shelter are the worst for this, getting dropped off by bus in a big squad and chappong your door and launching into a big condescending spiel are the worst. Genuinely hate them. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 We had Mormons at our door last night asking what makes us happy. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
capybara Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 That patter gets on my tits too. No I am not standing in a shop filling in my bank details for a complete random. Perhaps for someone rattling a tin they will get something. Poke yer direct debit though. Still maintain the studenty type, and shelter are the worst for this, getting dropped off by bus in a big squad and chappong your door and launching into a big condescending spiel are the worst. Genuinely hate them. I have had them at my door. And when I don't answer look in the window. I just sit there and wave at them. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
capybara Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 We had Mormons at our door last night asking what makes us happy. What did you say?? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 9 hours ago, Bairnardo said: When you watch TV, any show with members of the public on it, theu are introduced by name and then job title. Who the f**k is interested in what folk do to get money? Who is interested in defining themselves by it. Shite. 8 hours ago, Shotgun said: And this is Carol, a mother of two from.... Also, in the papers (remember them) everyone in any story about anything also has their age mentioned. Said Boghead ranter (52). 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 What did you say??No being interrupted when I’m watching the telly. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Ferrino Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 32 minutes ago, mizfit said: No being interrupted when I’m watching the telly. Masturbation is a sin don't ya know. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weirdcal Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 The pope is visiting Ireland. That's all I have heard about this week. News, radio folk at work and TV channels bringing up dates. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kennboy1978 Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 We had Mormons at our door last night asking what makes us happy. I hope you said "Telling Morons.....sorry Mormons to f**k off" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 4 hours ago, mizfit said: We had Mormons at our door last night asking what makes us happy. 4 hours ago, capybara said: 4 hours ago, mizfit said: We had Mormons at our door last night asking what makes us happy. What did you say?? This is the only response; 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerberus Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 When you watch TV, any show with members of the public on it, theu are introduced by name and then job title. Who the f**k is interested in what folk do to get money? Who is interested in defining themselves by it. Shite. They’re also never unemployed or have a job like works the till in Farmfoods.It’s all managers or some fud that works in real estate. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 16 hours ago, Shotgun said: Every weekend through the warmer months, charity beggars are to be found at the door of our local supermarket, often with a table set up. You have to run the gauntlet every damn time. Most of them are happy enough with a simple response of “No thanks”but occasionally one will up the stakes. “Really? You don’t care that children are dying of cancer?” Burn them all. You could try getting in first. Before they say anything, ask them if they would like to contribute to a charity of your choice. Make them feel like the bad guys. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasy23 Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 6 hours ago, throbber said: The masturbator will have stronger arms though. Well, at least one of them. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Markka Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 When you watch TV, any show with members of the public on it, theu are introduced by name and then job title. Who the f**k is interested in what folk do to get money? Who is interested in defining themselves by it. Shite. The quiz show Fifteen to One displayed every entrants name and occupation at the start and one guys occupation was "fudge packer". Marvellous. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 5 minutes ago, peasy23 said: The masturbator will have stronger arms though. Well, at least one of them. He's going to have to hope that Jesus wanks with both before he lets go. There's probably something about the size of his cock in the Gospel of Thomas. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Granny Danger Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 12 hours ago, mizfit said: We had Mormons at our door last night asking what makes us happy. Apparently they don’t want to be called Mormons any more so at the very least I hope you kept calling them Mormons. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 7 hours ago, throbber said: That's an easily survivable fall. You'd barely sprain an ankle there. 1 hour ago, Markka said: 22 hours ago, Bairnardo said: When you watch TV, any show with members of the public on it, theu are introduced by name and then job title. Who the f**k is interested in what folk do to get money? Who is interested in defining themselves by it. Shite. The quiz show Fifteen to One displayed every entrants name and occupation at the start and one guys occupation was "fudge packer". Marvellous. I once had a job on a pick and mix stall. One of the sweets was fudge. Part of the job involved replenishing stock. You can see where I'm going here. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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