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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...


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4 minutes ago, pozbaird said:

I think St Mirren might draw KFC Coleslaw in our Conference League qualifier. Pretty sure they’re in it this year. Moldovan mob I think.

That could be a zinger of a tie.

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53 minutes ago, coprolite said:

Also "oven ready" convenience food in a foil tray where the film won't peel off. Lovely melted plastic with your sweet and sour chicken chunks. 

Perhaps this a cue for you to do your own cooking rather than buy these hilariously overpriced cons.

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1 hour ago, scottsdad said:

I joined Platinum at new year and the benefits are multiple:

  • No ads
  • faster browsing
  • The other "hidden" sections of the forum
  • reading the Gold member's PM's
  • Weekly nude updates from @BFTD
  • Once a month we vote on a random Gold member to ban

I could go on...

First rule of Platinum Club...

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17 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

Perhaps this a cue for you to do your own cooking rather than buy these hilariously overpriced cons.

Perhaps i do my own cooking the vast majority of the time.

They have their place. Sometimes i like to take a break from my extensive repertoire of cooking varied world cuisines from scratch and get something quick and easy that i know the kids will eat. 2 for £7 or something on a couple of trays to put in the oven and dish up with some rice is a lot cheaper than £30 for the same from the takeaway, although it's not as good. 

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2 hours ago, scottsdad said:

I joined Platinum at new year and the benefits are multiple:

  • No ads
  • faster browsing
  • The other "hidden" sections of the forum
  • reading the Gold member's PM's
  • Weekly nude updates from @BFTD
  • Once a month we vote on a random Gold member to ban

I could go on...

I'm glad somebody's enjoying them. I've been putting on weight again, so feedback has been mixed.

1 hour ago, Hedgecutter said:

Is it just me, or are products that say 'peel here' or 'tear here' getting more and more difficult to open?

That's at least three times this week already that I've peeled a film and it's just ripped the top leaving the edges still sealed on.   Recent cases of 'tear here' not actually tearing and being a scissors job, and also cutting along the 'cut here' dashed line to find that it's been cut too low for the resealable strip to work.

Whoever's in charge of packaging engineering needs a good kick in the pie.

I've also noticed that the youngsters I ask to open these things don't seem to have any problems, so I presume they're bulking the kids up with steroids at school. Disgusting, but it's the only explanation.

54 minutes ago, pozbaird said:

I think St Mirren might draw KFC Coleslaw in our Conference League qualifier. Pretty sure they’re in it this year. Moldovan mob I think.

I still get childish amusement from remembering that Peter Schmeichel's middle name is Boleslaw.

I know it's an old name with a rich history, but in my mind it will forever be a typo on his birth certificate.

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12 hours ago, BFTD said:

 

Do the press still run stories about how we've run out of cod/haddock and we'll all be eating the fabled Japanese farting dungfish soon? They've been banging on about that since I was a wee boy.

homer.jpg.cabe2fe6766f0ebfc09de40a1bb52ac1.jpg

mmm... Japanese farting dungfish... 

4 hours ago, Hedgecutter said:

Is it just me, or are products that say 'peel here' or 'tear here' getting more and more difficult to open?

 

I'm disappointed by the "peel here" sticker. Because he isn't. He's deid. I have to put up with Tony Blackburn being here instead. 

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18 minutes ago, tamthebam said:

I'm disappointed by the "peel here" sticker. Because he isn't. He's deid. I have to put up with Tony Blackburn being here instead. 

I'm surprised Tony Blackburn's still with us - I'm sure I remember him dying a while back.

Unlike Peel, I don't think he's been Yewtree'd either.

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1 hour ago, BFTD said:

I'm surprised Tony Blackburn's still with us - I'm sure I remember him dying a while back.

Unlike Peel, I don't think he's been Yewtree'd either.

For 81 he still puts in a good shift travelling for radio shows and currently doing a theatre tour.

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16 minutes ago, Zen Archer (Raconteur) said:

For 81 he still puts in a good shift travelling for radio shows and currently doing a theatre tour.

Some of the auld boys can't face the idea of retirement.

Ken Dodd was in his Nineties and still playing to auld ladies well past the point that they'd all nodded off.

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6 minutes ago, Craig fae the Vale said:

There's a fly buzzing around my living room that won't sit still long enough for me to kill. It is driving me nuts.

Keep flies out the living room

 

 

 

Shit in the hall 

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In A-ha's 'Take On Me' video, they make it out that the young wifey couldn't pay her bill because she was trapped in the comic, but when she reappears out of the comic she does a runner anyway.  Major pie kicking required.

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9 hours ago, Craig fae the Vale said:

There's a fly buzzing around my living room that won't sit still long enough for me to kill. It is driving me nuts.

Get a cat, flys and spiders will never bother your household again. 

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19 minutes ago, The Moonster said:

Get a cat, flys and spiders will never bother your household again. 

What does he get to deal with the cat when it starts buzzing around the living room?

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1 minute ago, The Moonster said:

A life of happiness.

If you enjoy scaping shite and pasty pish-reeking clay out of a litter tray, sure!

Incidentally, we have a cat who sits on spiders until they die, so I keep finding squished arachnids around the place. Not sure that's a lot better for arachnophobes.

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Just now, BFTD said:

If you enjoy scaping shite and pasty pish-reeking clay out of a litter tray, sure!

Incidentally, we have a cat who sits on spiders until they die, so I keep finding squished arachnids around the place. Not sure that's a lot better for arachnophobes.

You can buy self cleaning trays these days if that's not your thing, but now I've spent the last 2 years changing my weans nappies, picking up a tiny wee cat shite in a bag is a cake walk.

My cat also does that, gets her paws on top of it and just sits down. Sometimes if she's feeling playful she'll slightly lift a paw until it tries to scuttle away before she pounces again. 

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2 minutes ago, The Moonster said:

You can buy self cleaning trays these days if that's not your thing, but now I've spent the last 2 years changing my weans nappies, picking up a tiny wee cat shite in a bag is a cake walk.

My cat also does that, gets her paws on top of it and just sits down. Sometimes if she's feeling playful she'll slightly lift a paw until it tries to scuttle away before she pounces again. 

Really? I found nappies easy compared to litter trays. Cat effluent is vile. Wood litter is a big improvement on the clay stuff. For the cat, obviously.

One of ours is a longhair, and has reached the point in life that comes to us all eventually - she's not flexible enough to lick her own arse these days. Dragging her into the shower for a wee wash has become a monthly endeavour  :shutup

Thankfully she's fairly easy-going. I've had cats who'd have ripped my face off.

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