Things you want to share with P&B

[Christophe]

Watching Richard Pryor Storyville. I might try and write some shit. Id love to do standup. You just need drugs to be an artist, I wrote loads of shit when I took E's

[Christophe]

I'd have to standup in character, couldn't do it as myself, need a barrier.

[Mad Capsule]

Got offered a new job today and I accepted!

Moving into a new business after 6 and a half years at my old one! Totally terrified!

[kev23]

Angus man diagnosed with being a lazy b*****d

 

 

Jim Dunbar has been late for everything.  Late for work, late for football matches, late for holidays.  He’s left women stood waiting on a first date, turned up to meals with friends hours after he should have and even arrived for funerals long after they’ve begun. But the 57-year-old says that it isn’t his fault after his poor timekeeping was diagnosed as a medical condition — at a Ninewells hospital appointment he was half-an-hour late for. Despite his lazyb*****ditis, Jim, who has spent most of his life living in Fintry, still struggles to arrive on time as he tackles the incurable condition.

Recently Jim, who now lives in Forfar, tried to go to the cinema. Knowing that it could be a problem getting to Dundee’s DCA for a 7pm show, he gave himself an 11-hour head-start.

He arrived 20 minutes late.

 

http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/news/local/angus-man-diagnosed-with-chronic-lateness-condition-1.124428

FTFY

[Granny Danger]

Angus man diagnosed with chronic lateness condition

Jim Dunbar has been late for everything. Late for work, late for football matches, late for holidays. He’s left women stood waiting on a first date, turned up to meals with friends hours after he should have and even arrived for funerals long after they’ve begun. But the 57-year-old says that it isn’t his fault after his poor timekeeping was diagnosed as a medical condition — at a Ninewells hospital appointment he was half-an-hour late for. Despite his chronic lateness diagnosis, Jim, who has spent most of his life living in Fintry, still struggles to arrive on time as he tackles the incurable condition.

Recently Jim, who now lives in Forfar, tried to go to the cinema. Knowing that it could be a problem getting to Dundee’s DCA for a 7pm show, he gave himself an 11-hour head-start.

He arrived 20 minutes late.

http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/news/local/angus-man-diagnosed-with-chronic-lateness-condition-1.124428

It has it's upside, he's a Dee so he misses all their matches.

[Mark Connolly]

The voiceover guy on the Rimmel advert sounds like he's saying "fanny lashes".

[~~~]

Angus man diagnosed with chronic lateness condition

Jim Dunbar has been late for everything. Late for work, late for football matches, late for holidays. He’s left women stood waiting on a first date, turned up to meals with friends hours after he should have and even arrived for funerals long after they’ve begun. But the 57-year-old says that it isn’t his fault after his poor timekeeping was diagnosed as a medical condition — at a Ninewells hospital appointment he was half-an-hour late for. Despite his chronic lateness diagnosis, Jim, who has spent most of his life living in Fintry, still struggles to arrive on time as he tackles the incurable condition.

Recently Jim, who now lives in Forfar, tried to go to the cinema. Knowing that it could be a problem getting to Dundee’s DCA for a 7pm show, he gave himself an 11-hour head-start.

He arrived 20 minutes late.

http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/news/local/angus-man-diagnosed-with-chronic-lateness-condition-1.124428

I do enjoy some of the readers comments

Doesn't look like he's been late for many buffets!!!23 hours ago

Edited August 28, 2013 by Enrico Annoni

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

The lazy c**t looks like Dr Bunsen Honeydew out of the muppets...

[Zen Archer (Raconteur)]

Angus man diagnosed with chronic lateness condition

Jim Dunbar has been late for everything. Late for work, late for football matches, late for holidays. He’s left women stood waiting on a first date, turned up to meals with friends hours after he should have and even arrived for funerals long after they’ve begun. But the 57-year-old says that it isn’t his fault after his poor timekeeping was diagnosed as a medical condition — at a Ninewells hospital appointment he was half-an-hour late for. Despite his chronic lateness diagnosis, Jim, who has spent most of his life living in Fintry, still struggles to arrive on time as he tackles the incurable condition.

Recently Jim, who now lives in Forfar, tried to go to the cinema. Knowing that it could be a problem getting to Dundee’s DCA for a 7pm show, he gave himself an 11-hour head-start.

He arrived 20 minutes late.

http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/news/local/angus-man-diagnosed-with-chronic-lateness-condition-1.124428

It's hereditary, his troubles started when his mother was late.

[Bigmouth Strikes Again]

It has it's upside, he's a Dee so he misses all their matches.

Dundee United fan Jim said: “I got up at 8.15am to go to a David Bowie film at the DCA that started at seven o’clock.

[mattydfc]

Biggie you have to remember he's a geriatric fool. Give him a chance.

[Christophe]

I'm pretty annoyed that theyre using Youth Lagoon on a Robinsons ad atm. Sort of ruins it really doesn't it.

[Christophe]

Had an office mare today, 100% polyester trousers, not good. Pubic hair standing up like i was resting my nuts on a fully charged van de graaff generator.

[Guest The Phoenix]

Had an office mare today.

Inside or outside the closet?

[Hedgecutter]

This morning on our way into a multi-storey car park, my other half dropped me off just inside the front entrance where I was quickly out the car in 3 secs. Cue the warden coming out of his little office thing to give me an aggresive telling saying "if you're going to get dropped off, do it outside! I'll let you off this time but if you do it again then I'll have you charged!".

WTF is that all about? We're always stopping in there anyway letting people reverse park.

[tinkerbelle]

Went out for a quiet family meal to celebrate our anniversary and my birthday which is next week. I have just been told that I am booked on a flight at 6 in the morning! On Saturday I am supposed to be visiting a salt mine and on Sunday I am off to Auschwitz.

Not really sure what to think.

[Swampy]

This morning on our way into a multi-storey car park, my other half dropped me off just inside the front entrance where I was quickly out the car in 3 secs. Cue the warden coming out of his little office thing to give me an aggresive telling saying "if you're going to get dropped off, do it outside! I'll let you off this time but if you do it again then I'll have you charged!".

WTF is that all about? We're always stopping in there anyway letting people reverse park.

Tell him that sounds fine - he has no way to enforce a charge for it so it'd be funny to watch him steam.

[tinkerbelle]

Is the flight ticket one way?

Aww would you miss me?

[welshbairn]

Went out for a quiet family meal to celebrate our anniversary and my birthday which is next week. I have just been told that I am booked on a flight at 6 in the morning! On Saturday I am supposed to be visiting a salt mine and on Sunday I am off to Auschwitz.

Not really sure what to think.

HR clearly think you're in urgent need of re-education. Perhaps a mistimed, ironic joke with racial connotations? Anyway, ask the Saturday guide who worked in the salt mine during the war, and what they produced. Created some serious squirming and obfuscation when I went. Wait till the end till you ask it though, you'll see what I mean. Don't try to create any humorous incidents at Auschwitz though.

[Sergeant Wilson]

Went out for a quiet family meal to celebrate our anniversary and my birthday which is next week. I have just been told that I am booked on a flight at 6 in the morning! On Saturday I am supposed to be visiting a salt mine and on Sunday I am off to Auschwitz.

Not really sure what to think.

If you're in the machine gun tower don't lean over to far.