Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted October 2, 2015 Share Posted October 2, 2015 I attended the funeral of an old friend today, he was so admired that there was a long queue to get into the church. What I saw really appalled me, there were actually c***s that thought it was fine to use the old 'look, that's so and so' we better talk to them just to jump the queue. The wrong man got buried today. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1320Lichtie Posted October 2, 2015 Share Posted October 2, 2015 There was a crash at the Scott Fyffe roundabout today, some old dear had went right off the side of the Arbroath road and into the railings. I was approaching the roundabout from the city centre. Just past the Boars Rock when I was halted by some diddy just casually sitting in the middle of the 2 lanes (road was extremely busy at this time, about 3pm) not letting me past, I was wondering wtf was going on as I was sitting there for a good 30 seconds with loads of people behind me. The car eventually started moving extremely slowly shifting over into the left hand lane, I drive past on the right, have a look at what's going on and some daft wummin had her window down recording/taking photos of the crashed car. Fucking unbelievable. Halting an extremely busy road for about a minute just so you can get a snapchat or a photo or whatever of somebodies crashed car to post online. Thing is the woman that had crashed her car was standing there watching her do it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted October 2, 2015 Share Posted October 2, 2015 (edited) I sincerely hope you gave her dogs abuse. Edit to add : the one blocking the lane not the one who crashed Edited October 2, 2015 by Swarley 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 There was a crash at the Scott Fyffe roundabout today, some old dear had went right off the side of the Arbroath road and into the railings. I was approaching the roundabout from the city centre. Just past the Boars Rock when I was halted by some diddy just casually sitting in the middle of the 2 lanes (road was extremely busy at this time, about 3pm) not letting me past, I was wondering wtf was going on as I was sitting there for a good 30 seconds with loads of people behind me. The car eventually started moving extremely slowly shifting over into the left hand lane, I drive past on the right, have a look at what's going on and some daft wummin had her window down recording/taking photos of the crashed car. Fucking unbelievable. Halting an extremely busy road for about a minute just so you can get a snapchat or a photo or whatever of somebodies crashed car to post online. Thing is the woman that had crashed her car was standing there watching her do it. What did the woman who had crashed say when you stopped and asked her if she needed any help? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 When you've been up all night Friday to breakfast time Saturday, but nary a bevvy has crossed your lips nor a powder graced your nose. Insomnia, weans and recuperating dugs. Being old is shite. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamdunk Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 What did the woman who had crashed say when you stopped and asked her if she needed any help? "put that away you deviant." 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1320Lichtie Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 Wid or widnae? Widnae. Not a chance mozza. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1320Lichtie Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 What did the woman who had crashed say when you stopped and asked her if she needed any help? It was a Friday afternoon, there was no way I was stopping I was wanting home. In seriousness though the car was a write off. Not sure how I could have helped even if I had wanted too. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dee Dee Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 It was a Friday afternoon, there was no way I was stopping I was wanting home. In seriousness though the car was a write off. Not sure how I could have helped even if I had wanted too. Oh Lichtie 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrcat1990 Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 Forgot how fucking posh West End of Glasgow is. Post fitbaw went looking for pub to watch late English ko. Every single pub only showing Rugby and stowed with c***s. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Getting back to hidden bongo...(which is the word I'll be using to describe scud from now on, BTW)... If you ever buy used DVDs, always take a look behind the wee pamphlet that comes in the case. Like hiding money in books, people seem to think DVD cases are a good place to store their naked pictures. Then they forget about them, or some jakey breaks in and pinches their collection...one way or another, the DVDs end up in Cash Converters, who put them straight out on the shelves. Let us all know how the now-inevitable search of your pals' DVD collections goes 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Tattiescone Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 I expect very little from delivery companies ever since I saw the TNT truck pull up, then the guy run, stick the car through the close door and drive off again within a minute without even buzzing the door. Their second "attempt" the next day didn't even involve them coming to the flat - they obviously just updated it from wherever they were! My brother in law watched the TNT guy walk through his small hedge and over his lawn to deliver a parcel. " Hey sir" he shouted (he's a Fifer), "why did you just walk through my hedge when there's a path just there?" The delivery guy looked at him, shrugged, walked back to the van (through the hedge), threw the parcel into the back and drove off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invergowrie arab Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Forgot how fucking posh West End of Glasgow is. Post fitbaw went looking for pub to watch late English ko. Every single pub only showing Rugby and stowed with c***s. Maybe it's because you were in Scotland? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Channel 5 scheduling a night of old Christmas programmes/films last night and some more on again today. What's that all about? Taking the piss or what. BTW, what is the correct way to pronounce "schedule" ? I usually pronounce it like skedule but some folk say that is the American way and the correct way is to say it like shedule. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Channel 5 scheduling a night of old Christmas programmes/films last night and some more on again today. What's that all about? Taking the piss or what. BTW, what is the correct way to pronounce "schedule" ? I usually pronounce it like skedule but some folk say that is the American way and the correct way is to say it like shedule. "Roll and Sausage". HTH 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 When Channel 5 first started they showed old soft porn films from the late 1970s late at night- Confessions of a window cleaner etc. Then they were bought by scud mag millionaire Richard "Dirty" Desmond and they stopped showing them. Hypocracy! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fae_the_'briggs Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 (edited) Movies for Men channel hardly has any "arousing" films on. When I went to report this at the Trades Description Office they were not very helpful even implying that I slept rough 'cos they dismissed me saying "nothing we can do so get lost you dosser". At least I think that's what it sounded like. Edited October 4, 2015 by Fae_the_'briggs 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFTD Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Has there ever been a TV channel as poor as Channel 5 were after launch? They'd have been as well to just show the test card most of the time. Literally not a single person watching at times when most folk only had five channels to choose from. Even that Norwegian station that showed the log fire burning sounds like it would've been quality viewing in comparison. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lichtie23 Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Ellie Goulding is an irritating c**t. I really hate her whispery singing voice and her shitty songs. One attractive lady though 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tamdunk Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Has there ever been a TV channel as poor as Channel 5 were after launch? They'd have been as well to just show the test card most of the time. Literally not a single person watching at times when most folk only had five channels to choose from. Even that Norwegian station that showed the log fire burning sounds like it would've been quality viewing in comparison. I used to like the late night sport they did. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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