The official Boris pm cluster-fuck thread

[Alert Mongoose]

This committee is clearly a nonsense though. Lied to the house of Commons four times? He must have made more than four speeches in his time as PM?

[Dan Steele]

From P. Eye

[Highlandmagar]

Tories in open civil war( have been for years), but still Labour will struggle to get a majority at the next election. Fact is, the electorate admire the Tories.

[Soapy FFC]

For a laugh (!?!) I thought I'd have a look at the Daily Mail coverage of it all. It took me a while to find anything, some story about Gregg Wallace seemed more important. You certainly have to scroll far before you can find the coverage.

[KirkieRR]

5 minutes ago, Soapy FFC said:

For a laugh (!?!) I thought I'd have a look at the Daily Mail coverage of it all. It took me a while to find anything, some story about Gregg Wallace seemed more important. You certainly have to scroll far before you can find the coverage.

I think he even embarrasses them now.

However, the even bonkerser Express is going with the BORIS GIVES LYING CHEATING COMMITTEE WHAT FOR! GO BORIS! schtick.

[Hedgecutter]

42 minutes ago, Soapy FFC said:

For a laugh (!?!) I thought I'd have a look at the Daily Mail coverage of it all. It took me a while to find anything, some story about Gregg Wallace seemed more important. You certainly have to scroll far before you can find the coverage.

To spare other posters giving that website hits to see, here's the current list of stories, in order:

• GLENDA JACKSON DEAD (main page-filler headline story)
• 'US man' throws two American women into ravine at famous German castle tourist spot...
•  'Why 20mph zones are WORSE for road safety and the environment'...
• Gregg Wallace, 58, admits his age 'could be' the reason his son Sid, 4, has autism but refuses to 'be troubled or place blame' on himself...
• Double child killer Colin Pitchfork CAN be released from prison subject to conditions, Parole Board says.
• What's going to happen to house prices? Two property experts go head to head... and one predicts a 35% FALL by 2025.
• Triple murder suspect in Nottingham rampage is an ex University of Nottingham student, police reveal...
• 'We miss you dearly grandad': Heartbreaking notes pay tribute to Nottingham attack victim Ian Coates as football shirts are left...
• Heartbroken parents of Nottingham rampage victim Barnaby Webber visit floral tributes left to their son as city prepares for vigil...
• Summer drought brought on by the heatwave leaves thousands of homes across Kent and Sussex without water for days...
• Boris Johnson's allies warn Tory MPs they face DESELECTION by furious activists if they back brutal Partygate report finding the ex-PM lied and deserved a 90-DAY suspension - as crunch vote looms on Monday.
• 'Beneath contempt': Boris Johnson's blistering response to the Privileges Committee in full.
• Boris Johnson slams 'nudist' Bernard Jenkin over Privileges Committee member's 'rank hypocrisy' amid claims he committed his own lockdown breach by attending a Commons' birthday party for his wife.
• Boris Johnson's detractors were quick to dance on what they hope will be his political grave...but he will certainly be back, writes JASON GROVE.
• Woman finds 'one-in-a-billion' perfectly ROUND egg.
• 'Well done you!' Kate is interrupted by a baby's burp

So, in at #11  

 

Eta: note complete lack of story regarding the Greek boat tragedy.  Boat not small enough?

Edited June 15, 2023 by Hedgecutter

[scottsdad]

His statement

Quote

For the Committee now to say that all such events – 'thank-yous' and birthdays - were intrinsically illegal is ludicrous, contrary to the intentions of those who made the rules (including me), and contrary to the findings of the Met; and above all I did not for one moment think they were illicit – at the time or when I spoke in the Commons.

The Committee cannot possibly believe the conclusions of their own report – because it has now emerged that Sir Bernard Jenkin attended at least one 'birthday event', on Dec 8 2020 – the birthday of his wife Anne – when it is alleged that alcohol and food were served and the numbers exceeded six indoors.

Why was it illegal for me to thank staff and legal for Sir Bernard to attend his wife's birthday party?

 

[Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo]

As well as a liar and a c**t, he’s a fucking grass too.

[ScotiaNostra]

sooner he fecks off and shuts up the better, the c**t should be jailed

[welshbairn]

Rees Mogg let slip today that there probably won't be a vote on Monday, as if the Borisistas challenged the motion it would expose how few in number they are, however loud and shrieking. He didn't phrase it quite like that, more that the vote was a foregone conclusion because of a few Boris hating Tories voting with the opposition.

[Mark Connolly]

4 minutes ago, welshbairn said:

Rees Mogg

Hopefully someone goes after that c**t next

[Molotov]

Typical Celtic Tory response:

[SandyCromarty]

Johnson is a complete and utter fraud, a worthless individual who abandons his friends and work colleagues continually to advance his own self interests, his contempt for women and his wives has been a disgrace over the years.

Alan Clark the filthy rich utter snob tory MP stated in his book that when his family mentioned they were going to the toilet for a shite they called it, "going for a Johnson", looks like they gave birth to Johnson who crawled out of the bowl. 

[GordonD]

Sir James Durridge has tweeted, "Why not go the full way, put Boris in the stocks and provide rotten food to throw at him?"

I think he was being sarcastic but it's a damn good idea.

[Rugster]

1 hour ago, welshbairn said:

Rees Mogg let slip today that there probably won't be a vote on Monday, as if the Borisistas challenged the motion it would expose how few in number they are, however loud and shrieking. He didn't phrase it quite like that, more that the vote was a foregone conclusion because of a few Boris hating Tories voting with the opposition.

SIR Rees Mog, if you don’t mind now. 

[Leith Green]

1 hour ago, welshbairn said:

Rees Mogg let slip today that there probably won't be a vote on Monday, as if the Borisistas challenged the motion it would expose how few in number they are, however loud and shrieking. He didn't phrase it quite like that, more that the vote was a foregone conclusion because of a few Boris hating Tories voting with the opposition.

JRM is just looking for a way to stop his pal being utterly humiliated, but does he think none of us noticed that by shiting out of the full parliamentary vote, Boris already did it?

[GordonD]

7 minutes ago, Rugster said:

SIR Rees Mog, if you don’t mind now. 

Sir Jacob or Sir Jacob Reese-Mogg, actually. The title goes with the forename.

[Rugster]

1 minute ago, GordonD said:

Sir Jacob or Sir Jacob Reese-Mogg, actually. The title goes with the forename.

Apologies, Sir D. 

[welshbairn]

Thing is he'd probably still be PM if he'd just said 'whoops, you know what chaps are like, a few snifters on a Friday afternoon, only had a bit of birthday cake myself but it's entirely my responsibility, shouldn't have happened, terribly sorry'. Just like all Trump had to do was hand the papers back when asked, and say paying off the porn star was nothing to do with the election, it was to stop Melania finding out. The 'just grab them by the pussy' thing didn't harm him in the polls after all. 

[BFTD]

1 hour ago, welshbairn said:

Thing is he'd probably still be PM if he'd just said 'whoops, you know what chaps are like, a few snifters on a Friday afternoon, only had a bit of birthday cake myself but it's entirely my responsibility, shouldn't have happened, terribly sorry'. Just like all Trump had to do was hand the papers back when asked, and say paying off the porn star was nothing to do with the election, it was to stop Melania finding out. The 'just grab them by the pussy' thing didn't harm him in the polls after all. 

Agreed about Trump, but during that period so many people saw loved ones die and missed out on huge life events that the anger against Boris might always have been too much.

Also, your suggestion for Boris isn't an honest response either. A truthful reaction would be, "how dare you expect me to abide by the rules, I deserve special treatment, and you have no right to question anything I do", like his old house master spotted in him at a young age:

He's a man who should never have been in a position of power or responsibility; a chronic narcissist for whom lying is an uncontrollable compulsion. If he works again, as opposed to milking his contacts for consultancy and speaking jobs, staff should leave immediately before he finds it expedient to throw them under the bus for his own benefit. He's an absolute danger.